10 annoying things about being in a Whatsapp group

1. One is started for EVERY.SINGLE social occasion that has more than two people attending. Yet nothing ever gets organised. 

2. The subject matter may start as ‘Derek’s Suprise Birthday Bash – Shhhhh’ but after the initial 67 seconds where everyone confirms whether or not they can be bothered to attend, the group descends into streams of asinine chatter for the next two to three hundred years.

3. No one wants to be ‘that guy’ who leaves the group first. That’s just asking for mass trolling (and you’ll never know what they are saying….*cue anxiety*).

4. You can’t just not say anything, either. That’s social suicide.

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5.  The group started by your boss. Brilliant, no ignoring that one is there?

6. Got Save Incoming Media turned on? Ha! Say goodbye to your iPhone memory.

7. Never actually being asked your permission whether you want to be added to the group. You’re just dropped in, like some unsuspecting lobster into a boiling pot. 

8. The grossly compromising/embarrassing titles your friends give the group. And the sheepish explanation you’re forced to give your partner/friend/colleagues when they see it. “Ah, yeah…about that.”

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9. Turning away from your phone for three and a half minutes to find 1,0247 unread messages. (And scrolling through every single one because, you know, FOMO).

10. Even when the event (for which the group was started) is over, it is never deleted. It just lingers there, forever…quietly annoying everyone…like Salt BAE.