Table of Contents
Introducing Josh Fraser
An influencer who makes mindset and psychology videos has made a series claiming to reveal the tell-tale signs someone is not your biggest fan
Josh Fraser Young from Christchurch, New Zealand, has shared a number of videos outlining how you can identify ‘the secret haters’ around you.
He has over 500,000 TikTok views and 193,000 followers with the handle @joshfraseryoung.
The influencer cautioned: ‘Knowing these will open your eyes to how people genuinely feel about you, so be advised’ – read on for the whole list and what a professional psychologist thinks of the claims.
@joshfraseryoung Psychological signs someone secretly dislikes you part 2. #psychology #signssomeonesecretlydislikesyou #signstheydontlikeyou #psychologyfacts ♬ Aesthetic – Tollan Kim
They belittle your successes
The TikToker said the number one thing to look out for is when a person downplays your achievements.He gave the example of a friend telling you, ‘Running a mile in seven minutes isn’t that good. I actually know someone who can run one in six minutes.Josh explained: ‘People who despise you are prone to jealousy, especially when you outperform them.
‘So know that when someone close to you expresses jealousy, it is because they want you to fail.Bayu Prihandito, a psychology consultant and life coach, shared his thoughts on the ideas.He remarked, “It’s true that envy can cause people to underestimate your accomplishments.
However, rather than a direct disdain for the person, this behavior is frequently motivated by personal fears. “Consider it a defense mechanism, in which downplaying your success helps them cope with their feelings of inadequacy.” They were never the first to reach out.
Next, they ‘are never the first to reach out’, and you’ll always find yourself texting them with little in return, Josh claimed.
He said, “The truth is, if someone wants to contact you, they will.”
‘People are on their phones all the time, so if they never contact you or make an attempt to respond, it’s likely that they don’t like you.
Prihtandito, the founder of Life Architekture, adds, “This point is quite oversimplified.” While it is true that those who like you will frequently reach out, not doing so does not automatically imply hate.
‘Modern living entails balancing several tasks, and because our attention span is shrinking by the day due to apps like TikTok, this can lead to accidental neglect in other areas of our lives.
‘In such situation, don’t jump to conclusions; instead, think about the larger context of your relationship and how you communicate.
They’re friendly to everyone but you
The next one may appear obvious, but it could be more subtle than you realize.
It’s that ‘they seem slightly kind to everyone but you’ – whether they congratulate others but never you or invite others to parties but not you.
Josh presented an example of someone stating, “What are you even wearing, bro?” I wish you were more trendy like Ben.
He went on to say, “You have to face the facts: the way people treat you is the way they feel about you.”
“If someone shows up for others but refuses to do the same for you, they do not like you.”
The trained psychologist explains: ‘This behavior is a clear indicator of unpleasant feelings, although it is not always a dislike.
‘It can also result from unresolved disagreements, jealousy, or even personal difficulties unrelated to you.
‘The trick is to understand why you’re being treated differently’.
They attempt to outshine you
According to TikToker, another tell-tale indication is when they constantly strive to outperform you and turn everything into a competition.
Josh remarked, ‘You got an A on the psychology test; I got an A+.
‘People who detest you are frequently jealous of you because they cannot bear it when you outperform them.
‘So, if someone close to you exhibits signs of envy and attempts to compete with you, realize that they are a covert adversary in disguise’.
Prihtandito says, ‘In many situations, this conduct stems from the person’s poor self-esteem and desire to legitimize themselves.
“While it can be frustrating, understanding this can help develop empathy and address the root cause.”
They quickly point up your weaknesses
Similarly, Josh claims that they are ready to point out your shortcomings or anxieties.
For example, suggesting your hair appears oily and asking if you showered, especially in front of others.
He stated: ‘People that despise you can’t tolerate it when the focus is on you, so they do this to drag you down in front of others.
Again, the psychologist emphasizes that this is frequently a’reflection’ of one’s own fears.
Prihtandito remarked, “When someone is uncomfortable with their own flaws, they may project these feelings onto others.” It’s less about disliking you and more about their personal conflicts.
They often misread you
Finally, they will frequently misinterpret your words, turning positivity into criticism.
Josh used the example of complementing their outfit; they may respond with something like, “What do you mean nice outfit?” I wear it every day.
He continues, ‘Because people who despise you have a bad perception of you, they’ll often perceive what you say negatively, so when they take your praise as a covert insult or a slight, know that they’re a secret enemy’.
Prihtandito responds to the charges, explaining that a consistent negative reading of your statements can indicate underlying anger or personal bias.
‘However, it’s also vital to examine your own communication style and the words you use, as they can contribute to misunderstandings.
One surprised user said, ‘Your saying I need new friends,’ while another remarked, ‘Yikes this is my hubby of 20 years’.
Others responded, ‘Unfortunately, my two sisters’ and ‘That’s all of my colleagues’.
Another said, ‘Unfortunately, this was my final relationship!,’ to which Josh responded, ‘I’m sorry to hear that. Remember, it speaks more about them than about you.
Stay updated on all of the latest news by subscribing to the ITP Live newsletter below or by clicking the push notifications.